Friday, September 08, 2006

Anti-Depressant Anyone?

I have been feeling incredibly down and blue and sad and depressed (more adjectives?) lately, and just couldn't get out of it. I've been asking God for help... just help to get out of feeling so hopeless. While the reasons were real, my attitude felt out of control.

And now I have to tell everyone the ways that God has helped me...

- a phone call from a dear friend in Texas(Sharla), and getting to connect with her about ministry and life. To be reminded that God does have a plan for every life even when we can't see it.

- another phone call from the same friend (Sharla), plus two others (Melissa & Glenda)! To be reminded of the value God places on creativity, and all the different ways that God uses His artists.

- a dinner with the BCM minister from UAF, his wife, and their kids. We talked about a new church plant up here that we might be able to help start, and a church that we will be visiting this Sunday. To be encouraged that we might get to do what we love soon, plus we've needed someplace to visit that might really be a place for us.

- my husband has helped me with two household chores (trash and dishes, which I hate more than almost anything in the world, except maggots, shots, & eating fish).

-a dinner out with just Jake and the girls, which means two nice things: I didn't make it! and we got to be our own little family! Plus we went to Pioneer Park, and rode the little train around the park, and rode the carousel, and played on the playground equipment. To be reminded of how special my little family is and how much I enjoy them.

-I read a really good just-for-fun book (Smoke and Mirrors, by Tanya Huff) and finished it off on the same day I started it. (pure escapism)

-the chance to audition for two productions in town. Even if I don't get a part, (I know I didn't in one of them for sure) it was fun!

-a regular doctor's appointment to follow up on my blood pressure (still messed up from toxemia when I was pregnant). My blood pressure was excellent! (112/70) My weight was down 5 lbs! (still losing 2nd baby weight) Plus, I told her I haven't been sleeping-
she asked me how everything was going-
I said well, not great-
She asked me how I like winters up here-
I replied that I hate them, plus we were supposed to have moved out before this year's winter, and I don't want to be stuck here for another winter-
she asked me how I felt about an anti-depressant-
I said I had been on one before this last pregnancy, but was taken off because of my blood pressure-
And then she gave me a prescription for an anti-depressant, which I've started this week, and it's helped some, and will help more!

I'm sure there are more ways God helped me that I don't even know about. I just wanted to say God is good! He has answered my prayers in a real and tangible way. Since it doesn't always happen that I see His response it was very kind of Him to make His answer so solid and clear this time.

1 comment:

John said...

Hope your church visit goes well. And remember, adjectives are the writers drug of choice. You can become horribly, terribly, irreversibly, uncontrolably, irrevocably, unrepentedly, tragically, regretably, insolently, madly, ridiculously, addicted to them. Watch out for the warning signs... Don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it.