Beauty Will Rise

I have been a Steven Curtis Chapman fan for a long time. I don't remember when I first heard his music, probably in college sometime around '92 or '93. He's written some okay stuff, but the majority of his music is excellent. And a couple of his songs contain lyrics which connect to my walk with Jesus in ways that are amazing.

Until around 3 or 4 years ago, his music has reflected my relationship with Christ- close, passionate, peaceful. Right around then I entered into a dark period of of questions and doubs, and I've mostly been listening to the radio since then (KLov is the only Christian radio we've had up here until recently).

I don't know why the radio has worked for me, but it has- I guess I don't get deep enough into one artist's material to start questioning where God is, what He is up to, or why we are here. I've been pretty surface in my relationship with Christ- Kind of going through the motions, kind of 'just getting by'. I don't listen to very much non-Christian stuff right now though, 'cuz I get SERIOUSLY depressed if I listen to more than one or two non-Christian songs.

But Chapman's latest album, Beauty Will Rise, has resonated with me. In May of 2008, Steven and his wife Mary Beth lost their youngest daughter, Maria in a car accident. Beauty Will Rise was written during the year after her death. The songs on the album reflect his journey through grief and loss- doubt, sadness, anger, hope...
Although I haven't lost a child, I have found peace and healing as I've listened over and over and over to this album.
One of the songs from the album-


I Will Trust You
by Steven Curtis Chapman

I don't even wanna breathe right now
All I wanna do is close my eyes
But I don't wanna open them again
Until I'm standing on the other side

I don't even wanna be right now
I don't wanna think another thought
And I don't wanna feel this pain I feel
And right now, pain is all I've got

It feels like it's all I've got,
but I know it's not
No, I know You're all I've got

And I will trust You,
I'll trust You
Trust You, God, I will
Even when I don't understand,
even then I will say again
You are my God, and I will trust You

God, I'm longing for the day to come
When this cloudy glass I'm looking through
Is shattered in a million pieces
And finally I can just see You
God, You know I believe it's true
I know I will see You
But until the day I do

I will trust You, trust You
Trust You, God, I will
Even when I don't understand
Even then I will say again
You are my God, and I'll trust You

And with every breath I take
And for every day that breaks
I will trust You I will trust You
And when nothing is making sense
Even then I will say again God,
I trust You
I will trust You

I know Your heart is good
I know Your love is strong
And I know Your plans for me
Are much better than my own
So I will trust You, trust You
I trust You, God, I do
Even when I can't see the end

And I will trust You
I will trust You, I will
Even when I don't understand
Even then I will say again
I will trust You, I will trust You,
I will I know Your heart is good,
Your love is strong,
Your plans for me are better than my own

Yeah, Your heart is good
Your love is strong
Your plans for me are better than my own
And I trust You
You are my God
And I will trust You


To hear bits of the songs: http://www.amazon.com/Beauty-Will-Steven-Curtis-Chapman/dp/B002O5Y25I